Well, I’m not actually living with it but it’s still there…all the time. My mother had stage 0 breast cancer that they recently removed without any problems and no sign of residual cancer in surrounding tissue. It was contained in a milk duct and was a non-spreading type. So hopefully she’s all done and just has radiation therapy ahead of her.
My grandmother however has a more severe case of breast cancer that’s deeper but on the same side as my mother’s. She already had 1 surgery but is scheduled for another. She also had a lymph node removed and thankfully the oncologist determined that the cancer is solely in her breast tissue. My mom and I think she should have a mastectomy at her age (83) but she adamantly refuses. I think she’s just denying the severity of her disease–she doesn’t even know what stage it is or the specific kind of treatment she will need to go through. I can’t blame her though but I don’t want her to give up.
My grandfather just finished radiation treatment for esophageal cancer that was located just above his stomach. He’s doing ok so far but was hospitalized at one point because he couldn’t bring himself to eat. So we went over to his house a lot and sat down with him to a warm dinner. Plus his wife also has cancer so it’s difficult for the 2 of them to help each other. My poor dad–both his parents and his wife have cancer. They were all diagnosed around the same time too.
It’s just been really hard overall. My mother’s brother was also diagnosed with cancer if you can believe that and at the same time but his unfortunately is non-treatable and has spread to his kidneys. So far he’s doing ok. It’s just a day by day thing.
I’m only 23 and I have to think about what all this means for me. Should I have a mastectomy now? I know people who have who don’t want to be faced with a silent enemy in the future. But I’m willing to accept that risk. I want to raise my children normally and then consider it, if that’s in my future.
But it’s been hard–I have to make sure my mom doesn’t feel the limits of her illness. I need to ensure that she doesn’t feel like she’s missing anything or slipping in her duties as a mom and wife. One thing she loves is babysitting her grand-nephew Theo (11 months) 3 days a week. At first though she couldn’t lift anything for about 2 weeks so I babysat him for her. I know it would have been devastating if she had to give him up. I stopped working for a month and concentrated on spending time with her and going to school.
And now I’m back facing an even longer road. It’s not as scary this time but still full of dangers. I hope my grandmother is able to free herself of cancer and make it through radiation ok. I hope my grandfather won’t slip into remission. And I pray above all that this was the last battle my mom has to fight.
